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  • Writer's pictureCheryl Eastman

Looking Back to Move Forward

Have you ever looked at your life in retrospect and asked yourself, “How in the world did I get here? I should be further along by now. What or whom did I allow to hinder me, and to detour me from my goal?” Perhaps some of the choices that you’ve made in life didn’t work out the way you had hoped they would. Maybe you’ve made some of the right moves but at the wrong time. Don’t get me wrong, God has walked me through some valley experiences in my life too. He’s brought me through many heartaches and heartbreaks that I’ve encountered by simply living life.  

There were times when I thought I would die because my heart was so broken. The pain was so bad that I felt like my heart was being ripped from my chest. I sense that there are a few of you out there who know exactly what I’m talking about. You have had those days when either you couldn’t eat because your stomach was in knots or you ate too much because food was your way of easing the pain—food was an anesthetizer and a tranquilizer for the pain. You’ve had those nights when sleep ran from you like Kunta Kente running from the slave master (if you saw the first season of the "Roots" series back in the day, you'll understand what I'm talking about). Your heart has been so badly damaged that you’ve asked yourself, “Will I ever make it out of this present darkness; will I ever come up out of this pit that I seem to have fallen into?”

You cry out to God and ask, “are you out there? Can you hear me? Can you see what I am dealing with here? I need you now. Come and see about your girl!” The tears are hot and endless as they roll down your face and drip under your chin and run down your neck. To make it even worse, the enemy tries to make you believe that you are not worthy of being happy, and he points his crooked little ugly finger of accusation at you and blames you for your current situation. He tries to make you look bad in your own eyes. He tries to deface you, devalue you, disregard you and make you feel less than less. Why? Because you are more than a conqueror. For so long, the enemy has lied to you about who you are. Oh yes, he knows exactly who you are, but the question is, do you? The one thing that the enemy is hoping for is that you never find out who you really are because once you do, he's in big trouble!

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